Eating in Half-sies

Have you tried only eating half of what you'd normally portion out for yourself? I recently made a half-sized bowl of cereal to see how much it'd fill me up. While I was making it, I reassured my panicking self by saying, Hey, if it's not enough, you can always make another bowl. After eating what seemed like the world's tiniest portion (it was actually quite normal-sized), I was... fine. I felt like I'd gotten enough to eat. Which really made me wonder: how often am I doing this? I thought I put the quantities in this blog to see what it takes to fuel my current body. But I don't think this is accurate. I think these amounts fuel my current mindset.

Note: Capitalized recipes are my own.

Day 70

• 1 c. hot Reishi Brew (reishi, fo-ti, vanilla bean, astragalus root, schizandra berries, goji berries)
• 1 serving of Apple Crisp (crust was hazelnuts, dates, sea salt; second layer was a sauce made from apples, dates, chia powder, cinnamon, and ginger powder; third layer was apple slices; topping was hazelnuts, dates, oats, coconut oil, cinnamon, ginger powder, sea salt)
• Banana Mash-Up (2 bananas, 1 T. sesame seeds, 1 T. chia seeds, 1 tsp. bee pollen)
  
• 1 c. spring water
• lunch out at Bruce's Burritos: spinach and sweet potato burrito, chips with guacamole and salsa, water
• 1 c. hot jasmine green tea with honey
• 3 c. kale salad (kale, sunflower sprouts, red peppers, carrots, garlic, olive oil, apple cider vinegar, dried basil, sea salt, pepper)
• 1 c. cold Pau d'Arco tea
  
• 1.5 c. of Banana Chip Ice Cream (frozen bananas, hazelnut mylk, cacao chips)
• 1/3 c. baked acorn squash with cardamom
  

Today's Observations
Have really been paying attention to quantities lately. I've also tried to be in Observer Mode (tm) when I eat smaller portions. Panic seems to creep to the fore, like I'm worried about not getting enough. Where's that coming from? Did I starve in a past life? Hmm....

Halfway Authenticity

Is it authentic for you to meet someone halfway? What do you feel like as you approach them and step further from your own side?

Note: Capitalized recipes are my own.

Day 69

• 1 c. spring water
• Superfood IceScream (1 tray ice, 1/3 c. Brazil nuts, 1/4 c. goji berry juice, 2 T. lucuma, 2 T. honey, 1.5 T. soaked goji berries, 1.5 T. cacao nibs, 1 T. mesquite, 1 tsp. maca powder, 1 tsp. colostrum, 1/2 tsp. fo-ti powder, 1/2 tsp. stevia, 1/4 tsp. sea salt)
• 1 c. hot decaf chai tea with stevia
• 2 c. brown rice with nutritional yeast, garlic, sea salt, and hot sauce
• 1 c. spring water
  
• World's Smallest Yumpot (1 T. cacao powder, 1 T. coconut oil, 1 T. honey, 1 tsp. maca powder, 1/4 tsp. sea salt, a splootch of water)
• 1 c. hot rooibos tea with stevia
• 1 c. hot Reishi brew (reishi, fo-ti, vanilla bean, astragalus root, schizandra berries, goji berries)
  
• 10 chlorella nuts and 1 tsp. bee pollen
• dinner at a friend's house: vegan lentil and vegetable stew, green salad with oil and vinegar, variety of nuts and seeds, my (second and better attempt at) Apple Crisp (crust was hazelnuts, dates, sea salt; second layer was a sauce made from apples, dates, chia powder, cinnamon, and ginger powder; third layer was apple slices; topping was hazelnuts, dates, oats, coconut oil, cinnamon, ginger powder, sea salt), water

Apple Crisp (second attempt ; )

Today's Observations
Our friends had a big beautiful loaf of wheat bread, a couple different kinds of cheese, and a local mustard on the table to go with dinner. I looked at the bread and thought, OK, Lees. You know that you'll have a massive headache if you eat wheat... and that was easy enough to pass on. The cheese, for some odd reason, wasn't really an issue at all. I didn't really want any. I was so thrilled that they were thoughtful in their offerings though! We don't see these friends often and you could tell they put a lot of thought into the meal. My Apple Crisp seemed well-received, too. ; )

Hydration

What does hydration mean to you? How much water can you drink in a day. I never really pay attention the "supposed-tos" of eight 8 oz. glasses or whatever it is currently. There's so much debate around what's the appropriate amount. There's also a lot of debate as to what counts as a hydrating item. Some say the waters found in your fruit and vegetable intake count; others say it's only water; some say it's water and herbal teas; some say only spring water counts. How do you feel when you aren't hydrated? I never knew I was dehydrated until I started drinking spring water... and then I couldn't get enough! Once I was hydrated consistently, my daily headaches disappeared, my skin was less dry and more vibrant-looking, and my urine was more clear. It was such an easy fix! The alarming thing is that our culture doesn't teach us about proper hydration. We're taught that when you're thirsty you should reach for Kool-Aid or a Lipton Iced Tea or a Coke. There's a lot of baggage associated with those choices: chemicals, refined sugars, caffeine... not to mention the emotional baggage! What changes can you make right now to address hydration? Can you stay present enough to make more conscientious choices about what drinks you choose to ingest?

Note: Capitalized recipes are my own.

Day 68

• 1 c. hot Reishi-Fo-ti-Vanilla tea
• 1 serving of my Apple Crisp (Thanksgiving leftover)
• 1 c. hot Aztec Fire herbal tea with honey
• 1 oz. corn and flax chips
• 2 apples
• 1.5 c. Berber Vegetable Soup (tomatoes, zucchini, onions, sweet potatoes, red pepper, chick peas, dates, water, Berber seasoning, oregano, sea salt) topped with nutritional yeast
  
• 1 c. hot Reishi-Fo-ti-Vanilla tea
• dinner out at Genshi: 1 avocado and cucumber roll, 1 bowl of vegetable noodle miso soup, green tea
• 1 small piece of chocolate
• 2 c. spring water
  

Today's Observations
I was really proud of myself today. I got the chocolate bar for Mo and I to split. I took a small piece and thought, you know, all I really wanted was a little taste. I felt how it felt in my body and knew that eating more than that would give me a headache. I told her she could have the rest of it (which, of course, pleased her to no end... LOL). Now, I'm saying this like it was nothing... It wasn't. This was hard as shit because my head wanted the rest... the same head that would get a headache if I ate more. I kept thinking, I could just ask her for one more piece! A great internal battle ensued. And the cool thing was that I tried to just Be The One Who Watches and not play into it. I let the battle go on without getting emotionally tied to it. Nice.

I've also been really craving soups, hot teas, smoothies, elixirs... another liquid-based. And I originally thought it was just the colder weather coming on, but I'm not sure that's all of it. I've been noticing that my body appreciates less to process at time. For example, the Berber Vegetable Soup did not sit as well on my stomach as the vegetable noodle miso soup. I think this was because of the chick peas. I ended up lapping up the broth and veggies in that Berber soup and loving it, but the chick peas weren't working for me. Foods that are easy (like veggies, fresh fruits, nut or seed butters) work well and blended foods work well. When I ate the Apple Crisp this morning, I had a small piece - and that was good. I knew that if I had a bigger piece then my stomach would start hurting. And that was because of the nuts in the crust. Hmmm... I'm really loving the simplicity though!

The Shocking Truth

It's funny to me that several of the raw food movement movers and shakers are coming out as not 100% raw or not 100% vegan. There is such a great misunderstanding about the raw food movement. Yes, there are some people that are 100% raw and 100% vegan, but I am finding those few and far between. Most people I've encountered are simply on a high raw (at least over 50%) diet. BUT this diet could also include raw dairy and raw meats.

The key here is to not get hooked on one way of eating. It's not about finding a box and stepping into it. We need to, firstly, start listening to our bodies. Secondly, figure out if we're enjoying what we're prepping and ingesting. And, lastly, develop a way of eating that works best for us, that increases our health, vitality, and happiness. I would argue that eating French fries and hot fudge sundaes every day won't do this.

Can you be honest with yourself? Are you willing to break the habits enough to listen? What's in your food? What is it sourced from? What type of life do you want to live? Do you believe that the quality of your life is directly affected by your diet?

Some things to ponder...

Note: Capitalized recipes are my own.

Day 67

• 1 c. hot jasmine green tea with stevia
• 1 c. Pear-Cranberry Pudding (Forelle pears, dried cranberries, banana, chia seeds, Irish moss)
  
• 1 c. hot Reishi-Fo-ti-Vanilla tea
• 1 serving of my Apple Crisp (Thanksgiving leftover)
• 4 c. Green Fennel Salad (green leaf lettuce, fennel, avocado, dried cranberries, pecans, sesame seeds) with Apple Cider Vinaigrette (apple cider vinegar, olive oil, honey, garlic, sea salt, black pepper)
• a piece of Lisa Marie's World-Famous Chocolate Candy (cacao butter, coconut oil, honey, my Third Eye Blaster cordial, carob powder, cacao powder, maca powder, goji berries, hazelnuts, sea salt)
• dinner out at Saeng Thai: 1/2 an order of Fried Sweet Potatoes (appetizer), 1/2 of an order of Fresh Vegetarian Spring Rolls (appetizer), an order of Vegetable Noodle Soup Bowl, Thai tea, water
• 1/2 of a medium Starbucks soy hot cocoa
  

Today's Observations
So, Mo and I were out window-shopping tonight and we thought a hot cocoa sounded good. Both of us got a medium soy hot cocoa. We realized about halfway through that we couldn't really drink the whole thing. It was odd because it was soooo sweet. It's been an incredibly long time since we've had refined sugar. Weird. Also, I am so glad that Hope turned me onto the soup bowls at the Thai restaurant! What a fantastic alternative to the usual rice or noodle dish! I've been so into soups lately. I want to eat them daily! I'm addicted!

Thanksgiving Revelation

I had a startling revelation today with my Thanksgiving feast. Thanksgiving is usually my favourite holiday. I look forward to it every year, brainstorming about different recipes I can make starting in September. And I thought this year would be no different. The build-up was the same, but when the day came... it was nothing like I thought it would be.

Driving home I realized that the reason it was always my favourite holiday was because it was a license for gluttony. And that's just not where I'm at now. My relationship with food is changing radically, so it would make sense that this holiday would be the one where I'd see that the most.

Admittedly, it was a little sad to see this change, kind of like growing up in a way. But it was also very freeing: it validated all the work I've been doing on myself and my relationship to food.

Note: Capitalized recipes are my own.

Day 66

• 1 c. hot Reishi-Fo-ti-Vanilla tea
• 10 chlorella nuts
• 1 Rye Pumpkin Cracker (sprouted rye, sprouted pumpkin seeds, ground flax, sea salt, chili pepper flakes, Bell's seasoning, parsley, sea salt) with some of my Mushroom Pate on top (mushrooms, walnuts, sesame seeds, sunflower seeds, carrots, celery, jalepeno pepper, balsamic vinegar, parsley, Bell's seasoning, sea salt)
  
• a couple pieces of Lisa Marie's World-Famous Chocolate Candy (cacao butter, coconut oil, honey, my Third Eye Blaster cordial, carob powder, cacao powder, maca powder, goji berries, hazelnuts, sea salt)
• 1 c. Smoothie (frozen bananas, frozen blackberries, frozen strawberries, frozen mangos, Brazil nut mylk, honey)
• Thanksgiving feast (small samples of...): seitan, smashed potatoes with gravy, squash, monkey bread roll, steamed broccoli, fresh carrots, fresh grape tomatoes, mushroom and rice dressing, beet salad, olives, cranberry-orange sauce, my Apple Crisp (this was surprisingly good... my first attempt!), vegan punkin pie, my Miso Mushroom soup, my Pear-Cranberry Pudding (another first attempt surprise!), water
• 1 c. hot Reishi-Fo-ti-Vanilla tea
• couple more pieces of above chocolate
• serving of my Apple Crisp
  

Today's Observations
Oh, my land. So, we have our Thanksgiving over at a friend's and within 20 minutes of eating dinner, I got a raging headache. The seitan is straight wheat gluten and then, of course, the rolls. Wheat always gives me a headache.

True Celebrations

We had a special ritual today for a friend to celebrate a cool life transition. Very beautiful foods, lovingly crafted. The dinner was so simple. It totally reminded me of how celebrations should be: conversations full of laughter interspersed with tears... with some food to nibble throughout. So magickal. Really a good reminder for me - especially with Thanksgiving tomorrow.

Note: Capitalized recipes are my own.

Day 65

• 1 c. hot Reishi-Fo-ti-Vanilla tea
• 2 c. Chia Banana Pudding (chia seeds, Brazil nut mylk, banana, bee pollen, honey)
• 1 Rye Pumpkin Cracker (sprouted rye, sprouted pumpkin seeds, ground flax, sea salt, chili pepper flakes, Bell's seasoning, parsley, sea salt)
  
• a couple pieces of Lisa Marie's World-Famous Chocolate Candy (cacao butter, coconut oil, honey, my Third Eye Blaster cordial, carob powder, cacao powder, maca powder, goji berries, hazelnuts, sea salt)
• 2 c. Miso Mushroom Soup (spring water, miso, shiitake mushrooms, garlic, ginger powder)
• ritual feast (some of each): Nik's Beet-Carrot-Kholrabi Salad, Hope's Apple-Pomegranate-Sesame Seed Salad, my (cooked) Spaghetti Squash with (raw) Olive Tomato Sauce, my Ritual Chocolates, hot Reishi-Fo-ti-Vanilla tea

Today's Observations
OK. 2 cups of chia pudding is... erm... a bit much. Let's just take that down a bit, shall we? I've been tootin' all day!

Exercise

I know this blog is supposed to be about food, but I think it's important to mention exercise in conjunction. Sometimes my food choices are related to my exercise. For example, I have a daily yoga routine that I do that includes some exercises my chiropractor recommends for my lower back and shoulders. If I don't do my exercises, I'm more prone to eat when I'm not hungry. I think this is because I'm out of balance. When I do my exercises, I am motivated to do more of them and am also more aware of my body, of how I move within my body, and am listening better to my body.

This can't be all about food. My relationship to food is contextual.

Note: Capitalized recipes are my own.

Day 64

• 1 c. hot decaf Earl Grey tea with stevia
  
• 1 c. hot Reishi-Fo-ti-Vanilla tea
• 10 chlorella nuts, 1 T. bee pollen
• 2c. Sweet 'n' Spicy Cabbage Slaw (cabbage, olives, scallions, sunflower seeds, goji berries, balsamic vinegar, olive oil, garlic, dill weed, parsley, chili pepper flakes)
• 1 c. hot Reishi-Fo-ti-Vanilla tea
• 2 c. Smashed Potatoes (white potatoes, sweet potatoes, olive oil, hot sauce, nutritional yeast, garlic, sea salt)
• 1 c. spring water
• 1.5 c. Banana Ice Cream (frozen bananas, Brazil nut mylk) with Chocolate Sauce (cacao powder, coconut oil, honey)
• 3.5 slices of conventional veggie pizza with 2 c. kale salad (kale, tomatoes, cucumbers, olive oil, balsamic vinegar, garlic, nutritional yeast, sea salt)
• 2 c. cold Pau d'Arco tea
• 1 c. spring water
  

Today's Observations
Had a moment tonight where I realized that I'd been making a lot of emotional food choices recently. Very intense moment.

Gentle Permissions

I recently had a friend of mine tell me that she's not ready to give up comfort eating. I really had to respect her for that. She's working through so many issues right now and that's just not one of them. I think this is a huge sticking point for people - especially women. We berate ourselves because we're not doing enough. There are some that truly aren't, but what if you're one of the ones that is busting your ass to take care of your family, working, participating in social events, AND trying to work on yourself. Maybe just one issue at a time is all you can do. Maybe just one piece of the puzzle is all you can work on.

If you can't be gentle with yourself on your own journey, you'll never be able to heal. Healing only happens through an admission of gentleness.

Note: Capitalized recipes are my own.

Day 63

• Chocolate-Banana-Hazelnut Smoothie (frozen bananas, hazelnuts, spring water, honey, cacao powder, mesquite powder, maca powder, sea salt)
  
• 1 c. hot rooibos tea with stevia
  
• 1 slice of White Chocolate Pear Pie (crust was walnuts, Brazil nuts, pecans, dates, sea salt; filling was cacao butter, coconut oil, honey, pear, cacao nibs, water, sea salt)
• 1 c. hot rooibos tea with stevia
  
• 2c. Sweet 'n' Spicy Cabbage Slaw (cabbage, olives, scallions, sunflower seeds, goji berries, balsamic vinegar, olive oil, garlic, dill weed, parsley, chili pepper flakes)
• 1/2 of this recipe, Superfood IceScream (2 trays of ice, 3/4 c. goji berry juice, 1/2 c. Brazil nuts, 2 T. soaked goji berries, 3 T. lucuma, 3 T. honey, 1 T. soaked goji berries, 1 T. mulberries, 1/2 tsp. fo-ti powder, 1/2 tsp. sea salt)
• dinner out at Saeng Thai: some fried sweet potato thingies for an appetizer and vegetable and tofu Pad Thai, hot Thai tea

Today's Observations
Today's lesson? Smoothies on my stomach first thing in the morning don't work. Let's just go back to the tea, shall we? And the fried sweet potato thingies... not too bad, but definitely am glad that I hardly ever eat fried food. Man, I remember eating fried food daily while I was in college. I lived on Diet Coke, pizza, and fries. Guess that begs the question of the quality of that living, doesn't it?

Medicinal Foods

There are many foods that I incorporate into my diet because of their medicinal properties. (I suppose all food is medicinal one way or another... ) All the teas I drink are to serve medicinal purposes - horsetail, nettle, Pau d'Arco, ginger, yerba mate, green teas... to name a few. I've also recently begun to take chlorella - something I've been wanting to buy for a while. (They're just so damned expensive, but I decided to take the plunge and just get 'em.) They taste marvellous! I also take Reishi tincture (my own creation) to restore my Yin energies and help heal my back. Take the time to research and experiment with herbs/superherbs and teas. Teas especially are a great way to get maximum benefit for a small amount of money!

Note: Capitalized recipes are my own.

Day 62

• 10 chlorella nuts
• 2 tsp. bee pollen
• 1 c. hot green jasmine tea with stevia
• 1 c. hot rooibos tea with stevia
• 1 slice of White Chocolate Pear Pie (crust was walnuts, Brazil nuts, pecans, dates, sea salt; filling was cacao butter, coconut oil, honey, pear, cacao nibs, water, sea salt)
• 1 c. Mushroom Miso Soup (miso, spring water, shiitake mushrooms, green onions, garlic, ginger powder, black pepper)
• 2 c. spring water
• 1.5 c. Barley Vegetable Soup (barley, onions, sweet potatoes, tomatoes, zucchini, honey, Herbs de Provence, Bell's, poultry seasoning, black pepper, water) with nutritional yeast, cheese breadsticks

Mushroom Miso Soup

Today's Observations
The breadsticks were a compromise. What all of us wanted was 56 huge veggie pizzas, but we decided to do just the breadsticks and eat the soup I'd already made. Go, Lisa, for making the soup this afternoon. LOL! Admittedly, I had some nausea and headache after the breadsticks.
: \

A New Education

What is your food teaching you?

Note: Capitalized recipes are my own.

Day 61

• 1 c. hot green jasmine tea with stevia
• 1 c. (using previous tea's leaves) hot green jasmine tea with stevia
• 1 c. hot rooibos tea with stevia
• Mo's Garbage Cereal (oats, walnuts, goji berries, mulberries, pear, sesame seeds, chia seeds with hazelnut mylk)
• 1 slice of White Chocolate Pear Pie (crust was walnuts, Brazil nuts, pecans, dates, sea salt; filling was cacao butter, coconut oil, honey, pear, cacao nibs, water, sea salt)
• 2 c. spring water
• LOTS of nummy goodies at Aimee's potluck tonight: scads of Aimee's Happy Tea (reishi, chaga, vanilla! Oh, my!); some taco thingies in romaine; piece of homemade chocolate candy, beautiful kale and sprout salad; some of my Pineapple-Concord Grape-Pomegranate Salad; Aimee's Holiday Croquets with Ravy Gravy; carrot sticks with onion dip
  

Today's Observations
All that crazy-ass food combining at the potluck gave me gas! But the food was outrageous today! Yes! : )

When To Change

"We don't make the changes we need to because we are not yet good enough at loving ourselves." - something Jim said once that really affected me

Note: Capitalized recipes are my own.

Day 60

• 1 c. hot rooibos tea with stevia
• 2 c. Hot Cacao (hazelnut mylk, cacao powder, coconut oil, dates, vanilla bean, sea salt)
• 2 c. kale salad (kale, tomato, sprouts, sunflower seeds, olive oil, sea salt) with Olive Sesame Dressing
• Superfood IceScream (1 tray ice, 1/3 c. goji berry juice, 1/4 c. Brazil nuts, 3 T. lucuma, 1 T. honey, 1 T. cacao nibs, 1 T. soaked goji berries, 1/4 tsp. fo-ti powder, 1/4 tsp. stevia, 1/4 tsp. sea salt)
  
• 1 c. hot rooibos tea with stevia
• couple bites of my Pineapple-Goji Salad
• 1 avocado with balsamic vinegar
• dinner out at Thai Dish: hot Thai tea, water, 2 fresh vegetarian spring rolls, order of veggie Pad Thai with tofu
• 1 slice of White Chocolate Pear Pie (crust was walnuts, Brazil nuts, pecans, dates, sea salt; filling was cacao butter, coconut oil, honey, pear, cacao nibs, water, sea salt)
• 1 c. spring water

White Chocolate Pear Pie

Today's Observations
Pie was odd, but dang tasty. It tasted like a candy bar with pear slices... which isn't bad, just unexpected!

Challenging the Habits

I've been challenging myself recently to stop eating when I'm not hungry. The other day I was standing at the kitchen counter thinking, I want to eat something. I was going through the food options when I thought, Dude! You're not even hungry! So, I made a hot tea instead and found something else to occupy my time. That day it was obvious; not all days are obvious. Though it feels tedious right now, I'm forcing myself to ask the question at every reach of food: why are you eating? what are you eating? what are you feeling? what are you trying to stifle? what do you want to feel? Powerful questions, man. Powerful questions.

Note: Capitalized recipes are my own.

Day 59

• 1 c. hot jasmine green tea with stevia
• 2 c. of green salad (kale, romaine, carrots, red peppers, cucumbers, olive oil, sea salt) with an avocado and Olive Sesame Dressing
• 1 c. of Hot Cacao (hazelnut mylk, cacao powder, coconut oil, dates, vanilla bean, stevia, sea salt)
• 2 stalks of celery stuffed with Jalapeno Apple Dip (walnuts, pecans, apple, carrots, celery, jalapeno, spring water, garlic, smoked paprika, chili powder, cumin, sea salt)
• 1 c. hot rooibos tea with stevia
• small package of chocolate-covered pretzels (read: comfort food for stress)
• Beans and Rice (brown rice under bean concoction of kidney beans, onions, red bell peppers, celery, Golden Delicious apple, tomatoes, garlic, smoked paprika, cumin, chili powder)
• 2 c. spring water
• 1 c. hot rooibos tea with stevia
  

Today's Observations
Dealing with car shit. Had the pretzels. Did the trick.

Purpose-filled Travel

I used to be intimidated by vacations, but I decided to change my attitude. I realized that no matter where I am, the challenge will always be the same: how can I find food in this new locale that is healthy, fun, and satisfying? With all the grocery stores and restaurants around, you're bound to find something. Be creative! Be daring! Ask for something not on the menu! Ask the chef to come up with his/her own cool dish! And most importantly, remember the purpose of your vacation: relaxation... visiting with friends and family... having new experiences.

Note: Capitalized recipes are my own.

Day 58

• 1 c. hot jasmine green tea with honey
• 1 c. hot jasmine green tea (made from the previous tea's leaves) with stevia
• 2 c. green salad (romaine, tomatoes, cucumbers, olives, sunflower seeds, sesame seeds, chia seeds) with some dressing I found that I think Jim made
  
• 1 slice of White Chocolate Chip Pie (crust was walnuts, dates, sea salt; filling was cacao butter, coconut oil, cashews, honey, cacao nibs, water, sea salt)
• 1 c. cold Pau d'Arco tea
• Green Smoothie (spring water, 2 bananas, 1 honkin' stalk of rainbow chard, 3/4 c. frozen blueberries, 1/2 c. frozen blackberries, 1/4 c. frozen mangos, 1/4 c. goji berries, 1 tsp. maca, 1/4 tsp. sea salt, 1 T. honey)
• 1 c. hot Candy Cane Lane (some pepperminty thang... whodathunkit?) herbal tea
• 3 nuts (I was cracking them for Mo and got to nibbling.)
• potluck dinner: 3 c. green salad (kale, romaine, carrots, red peppers, cucumbers, olive oil, sea salt) with Olive Sesame Dressing, 1/2 c. Jalapeno Apple Dip (walnuts, pecans, apple, carrots, celery, jalapeno, spring water, garlic, smoked paprika, chili powder, cumin, sea salt), Pineapple-Goji Salad (pineapple, goji berries, coconut flakes)
• 1/2 of this recipe, Superfood IceScream (2 trays of ice, 3/4 c. goji berry juice, 3 T. soaked goji berries, 3 T. lucuma, 3 T. carob powder, 3 T. honey, 1/2 tsp. fo-ti powder, 1/2 tsp. sea salt)
  

Today's Observations
CRACKIN' day today! Superfoods, raw delights! Too many nuts though. Already got the gas going on. LOL! Fantastically fun day with food! Yay!

The Nice Test

So, I wanted to be bitchy this morning and very consciously decided not to be. This was so unbelievably hard. ... ... Afterwards, I wanted to chew on a bagel. Interesting to notice what emotions trigger what food desires.

Note: Capitalized recipes are my own.

Day 57

• 1 c. hot jasmine green tea with stevia
• 16 oz. kombucha
  
• 2 c. green salad (romaine, tomatoes, cucumbers, olives, sunflower seeds, sesame seeds, chia seeds) with some dressing I found that I think Jim made
  
• 1 slice of White Chocolate Chip Pie (crust was walnuts, dates, sea salt; filling was cacao butter, coconut oil, cashews, honey, cacao nibs, water, sea salt)
• 1/2 c. of hot Wysteria's Warming Woo-Woo Tea
  
• 1 bag of potato chips
• 2 medium baked potatoes with guacamole and olives
• 1 c. spring water

White Chocolate Chip Pie! Loverly!

Today's Observations
OK. I got the chips because I think something's going on with my blood pressure. I didn't even think of salted nuts or seeds until much later or I would have gotten those. I've been getting really lightheaded and dizzy and for some weird reason... salt helps. That and water. Low blood pressure? Dehydration? Who the hell knows. I'm been feeling like this for days now. Very odd. The pie I totally made up on the spot... and it was a total hit! So proud!

The Paramount Issue: Edgrrr

Saw "2012" tonight. All I kept thinking was, OK, could Edgrrr (our 13-pound poodle) fit into the big red backpack? Cuz I'd need my hands a lot til we got on that ship.

(Not that this has anything to do with food, mind you. But I did think about how we'd feed him his raw diet. Does that count?)

Note: Capitalized recipes are my own.

Day 56

• 1 c. hot jasmine green tea with honey
• 2 c. Warm Nutty Nana Elixir (water, coconut, banana, chia seeds, vanilla bean, stevia, ginger powder, cinnamon, cardamom, cloves, nutmeg)
• about 10 dehydrated Golden Delicious apple slices (homemade! YUM!)
  
• 2.5 c. kale salad (kale, tomatoes, cucumbers, carrots, sunflower seeds, sesame seeds, chia seeds, garlic, nutritional yeast, olive oil, balsamic vinegar, sea salt)
• 1 c. of Smoky Black-Eyed Pea Soup (water, black-eyed peas, canned tomatoes, sweet potatoes, onions, raisins, dried Golden Delicious apple bits, smoked paprika,garlic powder, oregano, nama shoyu, sea salt)
• 2 c. spring water
• 1 c. apple cider
• 1/2 of this recipe, Superfood IceScream: 2 trays of ice, 1/2 c. mulberry juice, 1/2 c. Brazil nuts, 1/4 c. honey, 3 T. cacao nibs, 3 T. goji berries, 1 T. soaked mulberries, 2 T. mesquite powder, 1 tsp. maca powder, 1/2 tsp. stevia, 1/2 tsp. sea salt
• dinner out from Federal Spice: Tofu Burrito with a few of their chips (BLECH!)
• snickies from movie theatre: 1/2 c. hot green tea, handful of Milk Duds, handful of Dark Chocolate Cookie Dough Bites
  

Today's Observations
It has been SO LONG since I've had conventional candy. I must say: I really haven't been missing anything. The taste that was oddly predominant was salt - not sugar. Very weird. Only got a little buzz from the candy - which was less than I expected. Also, Jim and I got an order of Federal Spice's homemade chips and salsa to split to accompany our lovely burritos. The first couple were OK... and then I bit into the next one and, I shit you not, got about a teaspoon of grease. UGH! It totally tripped my gag reflex. I am just not getting the fried food thing anymore. Sheesh.

Go Easy

Take it easy on yourself. You can either realize the mistakes, fix 'em, and move on or you can realize the mistakes and chastise yourself and feel like shit. Be gentle.

Note: Capitalized recipes are my own.

Day 55

• 1/2 of this recipe, Strawberry Pudding (2 avocados, 1.5 frozen bananas, 1.5 c. frozen strawberries, 4 dates) with coconut and granola topping
• 1 c. hot jasmine green tea with honey
• 1.5 falafel patties from the Whole Foods salad bar
• 1 c. hot green fruity tea
• 1 c. spring water
• 1/2 of this recipe, Superfood IceScream: 2 trays of ice, 1/2 c. mulberry juice, 1/2 c. hazelnuts, 1/4 c. honey, 3 T. lucuma, 3 T. cacao nibs, 2 T. goji berries, 2 T. soaked mulberries, 2 T. mesquite powder, 1 tsp. maca powder, 1/2 tsp. fo-ti powder, 1/2 tsp. stevia, 1/2 tsp. sea salt
• 1.5 c. of Smoky Black-Eyed Pea Soup (water, black-eyed peas, canned tomatoes, sweet potatoes, onions, raisins, dried Golden Delicious apple bits, smoked paprika, garlic powder, oregano, nama shoyu, sea salt)
• 1/2 c. Marinated Mushies (portabello mushrooms, garlic, olive oil, nama shoyu... marinated and then dehydrated... MMMM!)
• sips of Jim's Breathe the Ale medicinal homebrew
• A Little Summin: 2 T. almond flour, 1 T. coconut oil, 1 T. honey, 1 T. cacao powder, 1 tsp. maca powder, scant 1/2 tsp. stevia, 1/4 tsp. sea salt
  

Today's Observations
The past couple of days I've been getting light-headed. I feel better after water and greens. Dehydration? Iron deficiency? Keeping my eye on this.

"Transitional" Foods

There is this category of foods in the raw food world that people call "transitional foods." This category subsumes that people are wanting to move from a SAD (Standard American Diet) to a 100% raw food diet... without the shock of doing it overnight. This category usually contains cooked vegan foods like whole grains (i.e., amaranth, quinoa, oats), beans, and seasonings (i.e., nutritional yeast, Bragg's). I've even seen some lists that include raw cheeses and raw milk yoghurts.

I think this category should be broadened and taken in context. For example, I have a friend who is an omnivore. She was starting from a SAD diet and now wants to start making healthier choices. She's begun buying local produce, grain-fed local meats, and owns chickens for producing her eggs. This is an excellent choice for her. I'm starting from a high raw diet and my goal is (most days) to better listen to my body's fuel needs. So, if I'm grocery shopping at Whole Foods and want some nuts, then I'm going to have to buy them pasteurized because that's all they have there. Pasteurized nuts would fall into that "transitional foods" category.

My family eats a high raw diet. The non-raw things that are included in our diet are the occasional going out (where we eat either vegan or vegetarian), quinoa, brown rice, amaranth, cooked vegan soups, air-popped popcorn, and baked potatoes (trying to stick to non-white). Also, we use balsamic vinegar, nutritional yeast, and hot sauce quite often. But does this mean we are "in transition"? I think our diet has always been in transition. As we have done research and increased our abilities to listen to our bodies, we've added or subtracted foodstuffs as necessary - and tried to do all of that without guilt or shame... something that I'm finding is lacking in the raw food community.

I've seen self-proclaimed raw foodists eating "transitional foods" while making excuses about how they are "still in transition." Their faces are filled with shame and regret. What is that? Is the label "raw foodist" putting unnecessary pressure on us? If we can't eat your food with joy and abandon, why are we eating it? Transitioning to a healthier diet also means transitioning to a healthier attitude, to healthier habits. While we're working on what goes in, we also have to work on how we process, and what comes out. And this isn't just about transitioning to a raw foods diet; this is about transitioning to that better version of yourself... whatever that may be.

Note: Capitalized recipes are my own.

Day 54

• 1 c. hot jasmine green tea with honey
• 2 T. mulberries and 1/4 c. homemade dried Golden Delicious apple bits
  
• 1 c. hot Wysteria's Warming Woo-Woo herbal tea
• 1/2 of this recipe, Superfood IceScream: 2 trays of ice, 1/2 c. cold horsetail tea, 1/2 c. pecans, 1/4 c. goji berry juice, 1/4 c. honey, 3 T. mulberries, 2 T. lucuma, 2 T. mesquite powder, 1 T. soaked goji berries, 1 tsp. maca powder, 1/2 tsp. fo-ti powder, 1/2 tsp. stevia, 1/2 tsp. sea salt
• 2 c. of Carrot and Beet Quinoa (2 c. quinoa cooked, 2 carrots, 1 beet, 3 garlic cloves, hemp seed oil, apple cider vinegar, dill weed, sea salt)
  
• 4 c. plain, air-popped popcorn
• 1 c. spring water
• 2 c. spring water
• 2 c. bok choy salad (bok choy, sprouts, carrots, olives, hemp seeds) with Hemp Balsamic Dressing (hemp seed oil, balsamic vinegar, spring water, honey, garlic, basil)
• 1/3 of this recipe, Superfood IceScream: 2 trays of ice, 3/4 c. cold horsetail tea, 1/2 c. hazelnuts, 1/4 c. honey, 2 T. mulberries, 2 T. goji berries, 2 T. lucuma, 2 T. mesquite powder, 2 T. carob powder, 2 T. cacao powder, 2 tsp. maca powder, 3/4 tsp. stevia, 1/2 tsp. sea salt

Carrot and Beet Quinoa... Beautiful!

Today's Observations
The quinoa was amazing. That and the bok choy salad totally worked for me today. Interesting, too, how the weather is getting colder and how I've been oscillating between hot teas and ice cream. LOL!

The Difference A Year Makes

Me and Mo, Atlanta, GA, July 2008

Me, New Gloucester, ME, September 2009

Note: Capitalized recipes are my own.

Day 53

• 1 c. hot jasmine green tea with honey
  
• 1/2 of this recipe, Superfood IceScream: 1.5 trays of ice, 3/4 c. goji berry juice, 1/2 c. hazelnuts, 1/4 c. soaked goji berries, 1/4 c. honey, 3 T. carob powder, 3 T. mulberries, 2 T. lucuma, 2 T. mesquite powder, 1 tsp. maca powder, 1/2 tsp. fo-ti powder, 1/2 tsp. stevia, 1/2 tsp. sea salt
• 1 T. hazelnuts
• 1 carrot with Olive Sesame Dressing
  
• 1 c. hot herbal ginger tea
• 1 Butternut Bar
• 3/4 c. sushi rice with 2 c. chickpea stew over it (chickpeas, red bell pepper, onion, garlic, tomatoes, chat masala, garam masala, Bragg's, nutritional yeast, hot sauce)
  
• 1/3 of this recipe, Superfood IceScream: 2 trays of ice, 3/4 c. goji berry juice, 1/2 c. hazelnuts, 1/4 c. soaked goji berries, 1/4 c. honey, 6 T. lucuma, 4 T. mesquite powder, 3 T. cacao nibs, 4 T. mulberries, 2 tsp. maca powder, 1/2 tsp. fo-ti powder, 1 tsp. stevia, 3/4 tsp. sea salt
  

Today's Observations
Need more greens!

Definition Dilemma

So, I'm compelled to revisit this issue of what makes it o.k. to claim oneself as a raw foodist. I've been claiming that my definition of it is someone who believes that a primarily raw food diet is one of the healthier choices and someone who also eats a primarily raw diet. Is this workable though? Some people think it comes down to percentages, but I'm unclear about the number: 50%? 75%? 85%? 100%? I'm not sure where the lines are drawn.

Of course, all this debate begs the next question: is it important to call oneself a raw foodist anyway?

Note: Capitalized recipes are my own.

Day 52

• 1/2 of this recipe, Superfood IceScream: 1.75 trays of ice, 3/4 c. goji berry juice, 1/2 c. Brazil nuts, 1/4 c. soaked goji berries, 1/4 c. honey, 3 T. cacao nibs, 3 T. lucuma, 3 T. mulberries, 2 T. mesquite powder, 1 tsp. maca powder, 1/2 tsp. stevia, 1/2 tsp. sea salt
• 1 c. hot decaf chai tea with stevia
• 2 c. salad (romaine, spinach, sprouts, cucumbers) with Olive Sesame Dressing and Tabasco hot sauce
• 1.5 c. Smashed Potatoes (1 part white potatoes, 2 parts sweet potatoes, nutritional yeast, sea salt, black pepper)
• 1/2 c. of malt-sweetened carob-coated raisins
• dinner from Thai Dish: 2 fresh vegetarian spring rolls, 3/4ths of an order of veggie Pad Thai with tofu
• 1 c. hot decaf chai tea with stevia
• 2 c. spring water
  

Today's Observations
I had an emotional day and was not in the mood to pull together a dinner. I'm very happy to live in the boonies and still be able to get decent Thai food inside a half-hour's drive. Love that Thai: vegan, low-impact food. Of course, if they'de stop serving it in those nasty styrofoam and plastic/tin containers...

Lisa Marie, Super Gen-i-us

"If you don't bring forth the perfect genius within you, it will destroy you. If you do bring forth the perfect genius within you, it will transform you." - the beautiful Rob Brezsny

Note: Capitalized recipes are my own.

Day 51

• 1 c. hot jasmine green tea with honey
• 1/2 of this recipe, Superfood IceScream: 2 trays of ice, 1/2 c. goji berry juice, 1/3 c. pecans, 1/4 c. honey, 3 T. cacao nibs, 3 T. mulberries, 2 T. mesquite powder, 1 T. soaked goji berries, 1 tsp. maca powder, 1/2 tsp. stevia, 1/2 tsp. sea salt
• Smoothie: 2 frozen bananas, 1 c. frozen blueberries, 1 c. cold horsetail tea, 1/2 c. frozen mangos, 1/2 c. goji berry juice, 1 T. soaked goji berries, 1 tsp. maca powder, 1/2 tsp. sea salt
• 1 Butternut Bar
• 3 c. salad (romaine, spinach, sprouts, tomato, cucumber) with Olive Sesame Dressing
• 1 small baked white potato and 2 small baked sweet potatoes with sea salt
• 1 c. spring water
  
• Superfood IceScream: 1.25 trays of ice, 1/2 c. cold horsetail tea, 1/3 c. Brazil nuts, 3 T. lucuma, 2 T. honey, 1 T. mesquite powder, 1 tsp. maca powder, 1/2 tsp. stevia, 1/2 tsp. sea salt

Today's Observations
Actually really proud of myself for making light choices.

Head-Stoned

Do you think your fork is a shovel? Sometimes... I do. What does that make my mouth then? A grave?

Note: Capitalized recipes are my own.

Day 50

• 1/2 c. Stop Yer Swinin' and Bee Well (one of my electuaries!) tea
• 2 c. spring water
• Banana Mash-Up: 2 bananas, 2 T. sesame seeds, 2 T. chia seeds
• 1.5 c. (but one teabag) herbal Sweet Cinnamon tea
• 1/2 c. Maine Sea Vegetables Nori Sesame Cashews
• 4 c. kale salad (kale, spinach, sprouts, tomatoes, nutritional yeast, garlic, sea salt, black pepper)
• 1/3 of this recipe, Superfood IceScream: 2 trays of ice, 1/2 c. goji berry juice, 1/3 c. Brazil nuts, 1/4 c. honey, 3 T. cacao nibs, 3 T. lucuma, 3 T. mulberries, 2 T. mesquite powder, 1 tsp. maca powder, 1/2 tsp. stevia, 1/2 tsp. sea salt
• 1 c. spring water
• Veggie Mex: (layered in this order) brown rice, nutritional yeast, veggies (sauteed only for a few minutes... broccoli, onions, mushrooms, red peppers, corn with spices), guacamole, hot sauce, sea salt
• 1 c. spring water
• Little Summin': 2 T. almond flour, 2 T. cacao powder, 1 T. honey, 1/4 tsp. sea salt
  

Today's Observations
Focused on listening to my body today and only eating when I was hungry. I feel like I made some good choices. Dinner was especially good... especially since I was thinking about hot dogs a lot today. LOL!

Monkey Mind

So, today I called Jim after having my Indian food and was bitching and moaning about how I'm so damned tired of hearing myself bitch and moan over food choices. I started to process with him about my food choices and he stopped me and said, "Look. You can't process mentally and process your food at the same time. So, the first thing you're going to do is to enjoy the fact that you had a good meal, let your body get all the goodness out of it that you can, poop it out... and then we can talk about it, o.k.?" I tend to get on this wagon of negative self-talk - so popular among us women - that doing something positive is a stretch. I'm working on this. I think I'm just going to have to keep doing it to get into the habit.

The other thing Jim and I have been kicking around is this idea of toxifying our bodies while we're trying to detox. If we are so DONE with the level of toxicity in our bodies, why would we choose to slow down the detoxifying process by continuing to eat foods that we know are contributing to that toxification? I'm not saying I have an answer yet... but I'm working on it.

Note: Capitalized recipes are my own.

Day 49

• 1/2 c. Stop Yer Swinin' and Bee Well (one of my electuaries!) tea
• 2 c. of Pineapple and Clementine Salad (pineapple, clementine ; )
  
• lunch out at Tandoor: 1 c. Darjeeling tea, 1 c. water, 1 naan, 1 order of Mutter Mushroom (no rice), 1 samosa with cilantro chutney, 1 pakora with onion chutney, 1 papadam
• shared a 16 oz. bottle of mint green tea with Mo
• 2 bites of a Pudding Pie Cup (crust was pecans, walnuts, dates, sea salt; pudding was avocados, coconut oil, honey, carob powder, cacao powder, sea salt)
• 1/2 of this recipe, Superfood IceScream: 2 trays of ice, 1/2 c. goji berry juice, 1/3 c. pecans, 1/4 c. honey, 3 T. cacao nibs, 3 T. lucuma, 3 T. mulberries, 1 tsp. maca powder, 1/2 tsp. stevia, 1/2 tsp. sea salt
  

Today's Observations
Am still noticing lots of sweetness in my foods. Kevin Gianni says that if you're craving a lot of sweets that you might be needing more sweetness in your life. Overall, still walking the tightrope of detoxing and habits.

Endurance

"Endurance is one of the most difficult disciplines, but it is to the one who endures that the final victory comes." - Buddha

Every minute I am working on enduring, every minute on bettering. Who am I to call my actions failures?

Note: Capitalized recipes are my own.

Day 48

• 1 c. hot jasmine green tea with honey
• 1/2 c. Stop Yer Swinin' and Bee Well (one of my electuaries!) tea
• 2 c. elixir (horsetail tea, spring water, sesame seeds, coconut, dates, goji berries, maca powder, sea salt, vanilla bean, Stop Yer Swinin' and Bee Well)
  
• 1. 5 c. of kale salad (kale, tomato, sesame seeds, pumpkin seeds, garlic, nutritional yeast, olive oil, balsamic vinegar, sea salt)
• 4 pieces of cheese pizza
  
• 1 c. spring water
• 2 c. cold horsetail tea
• 1 clementine
• 1 Pudding Pie Cup (crust was pecans, walnuts, dates, sea salt; pudding was avocados, coconut oil, honey, carob powder, cacao powder, sea salt)
• 2 c. kale salad (kale, tomato, avocado, balsamic vinegar, nutritional yeast, garlic, sea salt)
• 2 c. cold horsetail tea

Pudding Pie Cups... as prepared by Mo, Bridge, and me... Mmmm!

Today's Observations
Sugar buzz this morning! AGH! Pizza this afternoon! What am I becoming? Who am I?! Also, I'm eating more sugar and not necessarily when I'm hungry. Be careful, Lees... possible downward spiral.

Self-Kindness Comes in All Colours

Sometimes you need comfort. No blame, no guilt, no negative self-talk. Just take the comfort and move on.

Note: Capitalized recipes are my own.

Day 47

• 1 c. hot jasmine green tea with honey
• 1/3 of a medium-sized cup of hot decaf chai with almond mylk and honey from Whole Foods (Uck! This was really not good. I think it was just the brand of chai. Ended up chucking it. Blech!)
  
• 1 olive roll
• 16 oz. Poland Spring lime-flavoured seltzer
• a spoonful-sized taste of my pecan pie filling made for my class
• 2 c. of Banana Ice Cream (frozen bananas, spring water) with walnuts and cacao nibs
• 1/2 c. spring water
  
• 3 c. of kale salad (kale, tomato, sesame seeds, pumpkin seeds, garlic, nutritional yeast, olive oil, balsamic vinegar, sea salt)
  
• 4 pieces of cheese pizza
• 2 c. spring water
• 2 clementines
  

Today's Observations
Look, here's the hard truth: If it's the first day of my period and I want cheese pizza, I'm having cheese pizza. Dammit.

The Hard Truth

When I am trying to control others' food choices, it is because I am trying to control my own.

Note: Capitalized recipes are my own.

Day 46

• 2 c. (but one teabag) hot jasmine green tea with honey
• Banana Mash-Up: 2 bananas, 2 T. sesame seeds, 2 T. chia seeds
  
• 1/2 c. hot decaf chia
• 1/2 of this recipe, Superfood IceScream: 1.5 trays of ice, 1/2 c. goji berry juice, 1/4 c. honey, 1/4 c. walnuts, 3 T. cacao nibs, 3 T. mulberries, 2 T. soaked goji berries, 1 tsp. maca powder, 1/2 tsp. stevia, scant 1/2 tsp. sea salt
• 2 oz. of Cajun Sesame Sticks from Axis bulk aisle
• 16 oz. mango kombucha
• dinner made by Jim: some kidney bean and veggie thing on brown rice and a bed of spinach topped with fresh jalepenos and Tabasco!
  
• Little Summin' Summin': 2 T. almond flour, 1 T. coconut oil, 1 T. cacao powder, 1 T. honey, 1 tsp. lucuma, 1/4 tsp. sea salt
  

Today's Observations
Need more greens! Tonight's dinner was scrumptious though! MMMM!

Choosin' the Booch

Just have to go with simple today... "Is there a healthier choice you can make right now?"

Note: Capitalized recipes are my own.

Day 45

• 1 c. hot jasmine green tea with honey
• Banana Mash-Up: 2 bananas, 1/4 c. pecans
  
• 1/2 of this recipe, Superfood IceScream: 1.5 trays of ice, 1/3 c. sesame mylk, 1/4 c. honey, 1/4 c. pecans, 3 T. cacao nibs, 3 T. mulberries, 1 tsp. maca powder, 1/2 tsp. stevia, scant 1/2 tsp. sea salt
• 16 oz. berry kombucha
• take out from Thai Dish: 2 fresh veggie spring rolls with peanut sauce, Pad Thai with veggies and tofu
• 1 c. spring water
  
• 2 c. cold horsetail tea
  

Today's Observations
So, the last thing I'd had before I went to Whole Foods and Hannaford was the ice cream. I had to do a big grocery run and was really hungry. I looked at and rejected the following: Sunspire Peanuts (mmm... chocolate-covered peanuts!), goat's milk yoghurt, olive roll, falafel from the salad bar, cookies, soup, and sushi. I keep thinking of Kevin Gianni's recent video: "Is there a healthier choice I can make right now?" I stopped and stood still for a moment. I opened my eyes and saw the kombucha display and then remembered that Whole Foods now has kombucha on tap. I got a large one and drank it - and immediately felt sated. What a hard moment! I don't think people realize all the babble that a food addict has going on in his/her mnd 24-7.

Healin' the Hurt

Thought for the day... thanks to Philip McCluskey: "The hurt hurt people; the healed heal people."

Note: Capitalized recipes are my own.

Day 44

• 1.5 c. of (cooked) oatmeal with sea salt, cinnamon, raisins, walnuts, and honey
  
• 1.5 c. (but one teabag) hot blueberry white tea
• 1 small bag of BBQ potato chips
• 3 c. of kale salad (kale, tomatoes, carrots, sprouts, sesame seeds, sunflower seeds, olive oil, balsamic vinegar, nutritional yeast, sea salt)
• 1/2 of this recipe, Superfood IceScream: 1.5 trays of ice, 1/4 c. honey, 3 T. cacao powder, 2 T. Brazil nuts, 2 T. almonds, 2 T. mulberries, 1 T. goji berries, 1 tsp. maca powder, 1/2 tsp. stevia, scant 1/2 tsp. sea salt
• 1 Medjool date
• some of Mo's ginger kombucha
• 3/4 c. of cooked amaranth with miso soup on top (miso, water, carrots, zucchini, garlic, sea salt)
  

Today's Observations
Eating BBQ chips while annoyed = crappy headache. FYI.

What else are you bringing to the table?

Why do we always meet friends for dinner? Couple dinner with a movie? Say we'll meet over coffee? What can we learn about our relationships over food? What kind of communication are we having underneath the conversations about menu and restaurant choices? What is the subtext behind meeting someone for coffee as opposed to meeting for a meal? Will your relationship be defined differently if you choose to go on a hike or visit a museum together?

Note: Capitalized recipes are my own.

Day 43

• 1 c. hot jasmine green tea with honey
• 1/2 of this recipe, Superfood IceScream: 1.5 trays of ice, 1/3 c. walnuts, 1/4 c. goji berry juice, 3 T. carob powder, 3 T. lucuma, 2 T. soaked goji berries, 2 T. honey, 1/2 tsp. stevia, scant 1/2 tsp. sea salt
• lunch out at Ben-Kay's: Tofu Dumpling Miso Soup, 3 Vegetable Sushi Rolls, hot tea
• 1.5 c. hot apple cider
• 1 chocolate chip cookie
• 5 c. of kale salad (kale, spinach, tomatoes, mushrooms, sprouts, sesame seeds, hemp seeds, olive oil, balsamic vinegar, nutritional yeast, sea salt)
• 1 c. hot decaf chai tea with honey
• Banana Chip Ice Cream (frozen bananas, sesame mylk, cacao nibs, walnuts)
  

Today's Observations
I have noticed that the more I eat out, the thirstier I get. Must be the non-sea salt being used. I've also noticed that the more I eat out, the more I want to eat out.

Gratitude

This journey feels like a roller coaster: sometimes it's crazy fun and I'm screaming from the unknownness of it all and other times it's scary as shit and I'm screaming from the unknownness of it all. If I didn't have a compassionate support system, I'd fall to the floor in a tear-filled heap. I am in gratitude.

Note: Capitalized recipes are my own.

Day 42

• 1 c. hot jasmine green tea with honey
• 1/2 of this recipe, Superfood IceScream: 1.5 trays of ice, 1/3 c. walnuts, 1/4 c. goji berry juice, 3 T. carob powder, 3 T. lucuma, 2 T. soaked goji berries, 2 T. honey, 1/2 tsp. stevia, scant 1/2 tsp. sea salt
• few pieces of 3Cs Chocolate
  
• 2 c. kale salad (kale, tomatoes, pumpkin seeds, chia seeds, olive oil, balsamic vinegar, sea salt)
• 2 c. (but one teabag) of decaf chai tea with honey
  
• 1 piece of conventional cheese pizza
• 3 c. of vegan (cooked) Wysteria's delightful Corn Chowdah (sesame mylk, corn, sweet potatoes, white potatoes, onions, garlic, nutritional yeast, salt, pepper, cayenne)
• 2 c. spring water
• 2 dates
• 1/2 of a raw, lacto-fermented pickle
  

Today's Observations
Still moving through a lot of detoxing emotions and am trying to find balance. As I up my raw percentage, a bunch of old feelings are coming to the fore - especially wanting to be taken care of, wanting to be nurtured... a lot of what didn't happen for me as a kid. So, I'm waffling and am just trying to go with it and not be judgemental.

Comforting the Kid

Sometimes it's not a good day to detox.

Note: Capitalized recipes are my own.

Day 41

• 1 c. hot jasmine green tea with honey
• breakfast out at The Good Egg: tofu and veggie scramble with hashbrowns and hot decaf Earl Grey tea with honey
• 1 c. of marinated mushrooms
• 1.5 NON-raw, NON-vegan chocolate chip cookies
• snickies at a party: few bites of vegetarian chili, few bites of bruschetta with Italian bread, few carrots and cukes, few bites of mango pomegranate salad, small cup of red wine
• 1/2 c. cooked brown rice and 2 c. Black Bean Soup (black beans, tomatoes, sweet potatoes, miso, cumin, chili powder, smoked paprika, nutritional yeast)
• 1 c. of Banana Ice Cream (sesame mylk, frozen bananas) with 3Cs Chocolates
  

Today's Observations
TONS of cooked food today, but still feel like they were all pretty good choices. Something needed comfort today. I listened.